It’s a blog’s life

That other website has a some game-changing new information on the resignation of the chairman of PCC’s audit committee Mr John Evans MBE.

This is the young whippersnapper’s second scoop in the past seven days – I think I’ll have to take him a bit more seriously in future.
As Oscar Wilde almost said: To be scooped once in a week can be regarded as unfortunate; twice looks like sheer carelessness.
This latest exclusive is painful enough, but the one last week, which involved a mole on my own doorstep in Milford Haven, was even harder to bear.

And he couldn’t resist rubbing salt into the wound by emailing me with a detailed account of his mole’s communication about the comings and goings at Cllr Stephen Joseph’s house that Sunday evening.

He didn’t include all of the finer details in the report on his website, but the young upstart gleefully informs me that his mole told him the first to arrive was a lady, believed to be Cllr Lyn Jenkins (IPPG, Solva), in her red car.
She parked on the left hand side of the road directly opposite Cllr Joseph’s pad, but stayed in the car.
A couple of minutes later a Mitsubishi SUV type vehicle pulled up on the opposite side of the street about 20 yards short of Cllr Joseph’s house.
A young blonde woman (Alison Lee – Lab, Pembroke Dock Central?) alighted and walked down the street.
On spying the red car, she crossed the road and after a brief conversation the two of them walked across and entered through Cllr Joseph’s front door.
Last to arrive was a gentleman (Mark Edwards – IPPG, Prendergast?) in a Jaguar XF which he parked about 50 yards up the street on the left hand side.
He then made his way down to Cllr Joseph’s residence, walking in the middle of the road and talking loudly all the while on his mobile phone.
Jacob was also able to provide me with the registration numbers of all three vehicles, though, as this is sensitive personal information, I will not disclose them here.
All this torpedoes the theory promoted by some of the plotters: that the story was leaked by an invitee who decided not to attend with a view to undermine Cllr Joseph’s grand plan.

Clearly, this level of detail couldn’t possibly be known to fellow plotters skulking in their tents in Broad Haven, or Narberth, or any of the the other far-flung places represented by members of the IPPG.
However it is clear that, having acquired a very valuable asset right in the centre of my manor, the young pretender has become a real and present threat to the domination I have enjoyed over the past 20 years.

In more enlightened times I could have settled this matter by inviting a couple of my friends from Manchester to pop down to Pentlepoir and give him a bit of a roughing up as encouragement to show some respect for his elders and betters.
Nothing too serious, you understand – a slight rearrangement of his features and a couple of cracked ribs would have been enough to do the trick.
But, in these days of political correctness, that sort of thing is frowned upon, so this turf war, which could have been settled in minutes by selective use of the knuckleduster, is likely to fester on for years.
And they call this progress?

However, despite my understandable bitterness, I have to admit through gritted teeth (not something he would have been able to achieve following a visit from my Mancunian chums) that his latest effort is something of a masterpiece.

What puzzles me is why what was a minor breach of security should have so exercised the chief executive?
To summon senior officers, two councillors and the lay chairman of the audit committee to his office at the unsocial hour of 8.15 am to be given the third degree about the source of the leak, seems a bit over the top.
And threatening to launch a full scale investigation when none of them owned up was surely excessive.
Naturally, the conspiracy theorists will have a field day trying to make a connection between Mr Parry-Jones’ agitation and property grants in, of all places, Pembroke Dock.
However, in keeping with my policy of dealing only with the facts, such speculation will not be allowed to intrude on this columnar territory.

While the Boy Wonder basks in the glory of his latest scoop, I would point out that none of this would have come about had it not been for my painstaking efforts in uncovering the truth about these Pembroke Dock grants.
And I also flatter myself that Mr Evans’ decision to reveal the full story about the circumstances surrounding his resignation was inspired by my cunningly worded question to the Leader at the council meeting on July 17 and Cllr Adams’ less than frank reply.
Having said that, I don’t begrudge the Pentlepoir penpusher his fifteen minutes of fame.
It has always been my aim to encourage youthful participation in the political process.
However, in this particular case, I sometimes wonder if I might be blogging a dead horse.

On the subject of terrible puns, I notice that that Jacob has suggested, with reference to this website, that ‘every blog has its day’, but I think he went too far when he suggested that I may even lose my place in the pecking order to Cllr Simon Hancock’s recently launched website.
However, my information is that Cllr Hancock, who I believe we will soon have to refer to as Dr Hancock, is launching this website as a replacement for Mogadon.
According to Wikipedia: “Mogadon decreases the time taken to fall asleep and nocturnal awakenings, as well as increasing the total amount of time spent sleeping.”
However, it has some adverse side effects and is “only suitable for short-term treatment of insomnia as it has a high potential for dependence and addiction”.

Cllr Hancock’s invention, patented as ‘Blogadon’: a non-chemical, environmentally-friendly, ethically-sound treatment, has all the benefits of Mogadon without any of the adverse side effects.
Wikipedia says that: “Mogadon should be taken shortly before going to bed for the night. You should make sure that you will be able to have an uninterrupted sleep of seven to eight hours”.
Blogadon can be taken at any time of the day or night and can be guaranteed to provide at least ten hours of the deepest slumber.

Unfortunately, the new wonder drug has not yet been licensed for public use because while most participants in the clinical trials were fast asleep before they got to the end of the report on Neyland carnival, not one made it past the end of “Wild flowers in Frederick Street”. Analysis of the results has shown that, on awaking, a significant number of users had completely lost the will to live.

NICE has suggested that strategically placed links to this site, and Jacob’s, might alleviate this problem by giving Blogadon users something interesting to read.
I’m not entirely convinced by this reasoning because if I wake up in the middle of the night I usually find that a minute or two on that other website has me quickly seeking refuge back under the duvet.

But I digress.

I fancy that Jacob will eventually be forced to eat his mocking words when several of the posts which I have planned for the next few weeks demonstrate that there’s life in the old blog, yet.

And he would do well to reflect that this website will be 14 years old come November and that a blog is for life, not just for Christmas.